MOVED to TUMBLR

i've abandoned blogspot for Tumblr.

http://captainchesticals.tumblr.com/

Tumblr for the win.

Brag #37 :President Obama Speaks to the Muslim World from Cairo, Egypt

thank gawd he doesn't think with his dick
we need more people like him

PEACE THROUGHOUT REGARDLESS WHAT YOU ARE!

Brag #36 : Zee Avi - "Bitter Heart"

A.k.a. Koko Kaina from Youtube

Malaysian, signed under Bushfire Record (along with Jack Johnson), a good friend of mine's cousin. THE biggest new comer after Dato' Michelle Yeoh and maybe Che'Nelle.
This is Zee's first single from her official up-coming album :D epic win!

Brag #35: The Colonel

I'd pay to watch this

Brag #34: Fill in the Blank with Crappy Answers

i was tagged by Charlene Ong



I like to eat: pussy

When I grow up, I will be: a Pussycat Doll member

Tomorrow is: DOOMS DAY!

I love: to hump

Kids are: evolved Sea Monkeys

Britney Spears looks like: my ass hole

I have: chesticles

I live in: my pussy, yes, I'm a sexy snail

I really want to live in: your pussy.

I want to have a vacation at: your pussy.

Make-up is: for clowns.

My parents are: half dead.

I want: to be a star, i wna be famous *pussycat dolls dance*

People say I look like: a million dollah

My favorite restaurant is: your momma's cooking

The weather is: depending with God's mood, when He's pissy the sky gets "pissy" too if you know what I mean

I like to drink: things that would give me kencing manis in future

My hero is: U2 Bono, party like a rockstar but gives help like a Robin Hood

My favorite song is: Row Row Row Your Boat

My favorite movie is: Pant's Labour-inth and something whatever...

True love is: an illusion

Money is: spelled backward for "yenoM"

Brag #33: Barack Hussein Obama

<3 speech + voice *hump*
... 'nuff said *peace*
Oh Bush, P/S:

Brag #32: Tigriss

...seriously?

1. singing - TOTAL OUT
   
2. outfit - out
3. presentation - out
4. hawtness - out

PLEASE - tell her, her singing is bringing Armageddon closer to earth!

Brag #31: Maxis To DiGi, A Haunting Tale (MUST READ)

Very Shocking.....

This is a real story of a young college girl who passed away last month in Penang . Her name was Ai Ling. She was hit by a truck.

She was working in a call center. She had a boy friend named Tony.

Both of them were true lovers. They always talked on the phone. She used to be never found without her handphone.

In fact she also changed her network from Maxis to Digi, so that both of them can be on the same network, and save on the cost. Even when Tony left overseas to finish his masters, they constantly kept in touch.

She used to spend half of the day talking with Tony.
Ai Ling's family knew about their relationship.. Tony was very close to Ai Ling's family as well. (Just
imagine their love) . Before she passed away she always told her friends 'If I pass away please burn me with my handphone' she also said the same thing to her parents.

After her death, people cudnt carry her body, A lot of them tried to do so, but still cant everybody that had tried to carry the body, the results were the same.

Eventually, they called a person known to one of their neighbours, who can speak with the soul of dead person and who was a friend of her father.

He took a stick and started speaking to himself slowly.
After a few minutes, he said 'this girl misses something here.' Then her friends told that person about her intentions to burn her with her phone.

He then opened the grave box and place her phone and sim card inside the casket. After that they tried to carry the body. It was then moved easily and they then carried her into the van.

All of us were shocked. Ai Ling's parents did not inform Tony that Ai Ling had passed away as they're waiting for him to come home after his graduation..

After 2 weeks Tony returned and called Ai Ling's mom.......

Tony:....'Aunty, I'm coming home today. Cook something nice for me. Don't tell Ai Ling that I'm coming home today, I wanna surprise her.'
Her mother replied..... 'come home first, I wanna tell you something very important.'

After he came, they told him the truth about Ai Ling.
Tony thinks that they were playing a fool. He was laughing and said 'don't try to fool me - tell Ai Ling to come out, i have a gift for her... Please stop this nonsense'.

Then they show him the original death certificate to him. They gave him proof to make him believe. (Tony started to sweat) He said... 'Its not true. We spoke yesterday.. She still calls me.
Tony was shaking.

Suddenly, Tony's phone rang. 'see this is from Ai Ling, see this....' he showed the phone to Ai Ling's family. all of them told him to answer. he talked using the loudspeaker mode.

All of them heard his conversation. It is the actual voice of Ai Ling & there is no way others could use her sim card since it is nailed inside the grave box!

They were so shocked and asked for the same person's (who can speak with the soul of dead persons) help again. He brought his master to solve this matter.

He & his master worked for 5 hours. Then they discovered one thing which really shocked them....

DiGi 'I will follow you!!!'




Don't shout at me I am also looking for the person who has sent me this shit....so what
you can do...you should also forward this piece of crap to all your buddies...and enjoy...like i enjoyed. HAHAHAHAHA...

GOTCHA!

ngahahahahahahaha!

haaaaa... that was way too gooood

Brag #30: Care for a Cuban Cigar Much?

Brag #29: I Can't Think Straight

"i want to be with someone who makes my heart jumps when i hear her keys in the door ... and that someone is you"


Shazo's Lesbionic Brain says:

• Lisa Ray <3>
• Indian + Palestinian lesbians ? = comedy situation to MUST watch lol
• i sense a little dejavou in my first experience when view trailer
• the jokes you'd get to understand like mad about Indian culture meets lesbianism
• is in utter sadness mode because OBVIOUSLY Malaysia would NEVER screen this in cinema thus have to wait for MONTHS/years for the pirated DVD to be out D': betchness
  

Synopsis :

In the upper echelons of traditional Middle Eastern society, Reema and Omar prepare for the marriage of their daughter Tala. But back at work in London, Tala encounters Leyla, a young British Indian woman who is dating Tala's best friend Ali. Tala sees something unique in the artless, clumsy, sensitive Leyla who secretly works to become a writer. And Tala's forthright challenges to Leyla's beliefs begins a journey of self-awareness for Leyla. As the women fall in love, Tala's own sense of duty and cultural restraint cause her to pull away from Leyla and fly back to Jordan where the preparations for an ostentatious wedding are well under way. As family members descend and the wedding day approaches, the pressure mounts until Tala finally cracks and extricates herself. Back in London, Leyla is heartbroken but learns to break free of her own self-doubt and her mother's expectations, ditching Ali and being honest with her parents about her sexuality. When Ali and Leyla's feisty sister Zara help throw Tala and Leyla together again, Tala finds that her own preconceptions of what love can be is the final hurdle she must jump to win Leyla back.

The tagline :

• You can only find true love when you're true to yourself.
• Two Cultures. Two Traditions. One Love.

Brag #28 : Dear Denise Chan, My Mock Letter To You, -signed S-

Fill in the blanks by answering the questions provided below.

Retype your 'mock letter' at the end of the post.

Dear (the last person who left a comment on your blog).

I don't really know how to tell you this, but ___1___.I think I realized it when ___2______3___ and I saw you ___4___ ___5___. I'm sure you're ___6___ enough to understand ___7___. I'm returning ___8___ to you, but I'll keep ___9___ as a memory. You should also know that I ___10___ ___11___.___12___.

With Love;
-Your name-

P/S: You are so lifeless, ___13___, -The name of the person that tagged you-.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. What's the color of your shirt?

Blue - Our romance is over

Red - Our affair is over

White - I'll join the monastery

Black - I dislike you

Green - Our horoscope doesn't match

Grey - You're a pervert

Yellow - I'm selling myself

Pink - Your nostrils are insulting

Brown - The mafia wants you

No shirt - You're a loser

Other - I'm in love with your sister

2. Which is your birth month?

January - That night

February - Last year

March - When your dwarf bit me

April - When I tripped on sesame seeds

May - First of May

June - When you put cuffs on me

July - When I threw up

August - When I saw the shrunken head

September - When we skinny dipped

October - When I quoted Santa

November - When your dog ran amok

December - When I changed tennis shoes

3. Which food do you prefer?

Tacos - In your apartment

Pizza - In your camping car

Pasta - Outside of Chicago

Hamburgers - Under the bus

Salad - As you ate enchilada

Chicken - In your closet

Kebab - With Paris Hilton

Fish - In women's clothing

Sandwiches - At the Hare Krishna graduation

Lasagna - At the mental hospital

Hot dog - Under a state of trance

None of the above - With George Bush and his wife

4. What's the color of your socks?

Yellow - Hit on

Red - Insult

Black - Ignore

Blue - Knock out

Purple - Pour syrup on

White - Carve your initials into

Grey - Pull the clothes off

Brown - Put leeches on

Orange - Castrate

Pink - Pull the toupee off

Barefoot - Sit on

Other - Drive out

5. What's the color of your underwear?

Black - My best friend

White - My father

Grey - Bill Clinton

Brown - My fart balloon

Purple - My mustard soufflé

Red - Donald Duck

Blue - My avocado plant

Yellow - My penpal in Ghana

Orange - My Kid Rock-collection

Pink - Manchester United's goalkeeper

None - My John F. Kennedy-statue

Other - The crazy monk

6. What do you prefer to watch on TV?

Scrubs - Man

O.C. - Emotional

One Tree Hill - Open

Heroes - Frostbitten

Lost - Scarred

Simpsons - Cowardly

The news - Mongolic

American Idol - Masochistic

Family Guy - Senile

Top Model - Middle-class

None of the above - Ashamed

7. Your mood right now?

Happy - How awful I've felt

Sad - How boring you are

Bored - That Santa doesn't exist

Angry - That your pimples are at the last stage

Depressed - That we're cousins

Excited - That there is no solution to this

Nervous-The middle east

Worried-That your Honda sucks

Apathetic - That I did a sex-change

Ashamed - That I'm allergic to your hamster

Cuddly - That I get turned on by garbage men

Overjoyous - That I'm open

Other-That Extreme Home Makeover sucks

8. What's the color of your walls in your bedroom?

White - Your ring

Yellow - Your love letters

Red - Your Darth Vader

Black - Your tame stone

Blue - The couch cushions

Green - The pictures from LA

Orange - Your false teeth

Brown - Your contact book

Grey - Our matching snoopy-bibs

Purple - Your old lottery coupons

Pink - The cut toenails

Other - Your memories from the military service

9. The first letter of your first name?

A/B - Your photo

C/D - The oil stocks

E/F - Your neighbour Martin

G/H - My virginity

I/J - The results of your blood-sample

K/L - Your left ear

M/N - Your suicide note

O/P - My common sense

Q/R - Your mom

S/T - Your collection of butterflies

U/V - Your criminal record

W/X - David's tricot outfits

Y/Z - Your grades from college

10. The last letter in your last name?

A/B - Always will remember

C/D - Never will forget

E/F - Always wanted to break

G/H - Never openly mocked

I/J - Always have felt dirty before

K/L - Will tell the authorities about

M/N - Told in my confession today about

O/P - Was interviewed by the Times about

Q/R - Told my psychiatrist about

S/T - Get sick when I think of

U/V - Always will try to forget

W/X - Am better off without

Y/Z - Never liked

11. What do you prefer to drink?

Water- Our friendship

Beer - Senility

Soft drink - A new life as a clone

Soda - The incarnation as an eskimo

Milk - The apartment building

Wine - Cocaine

Cider- A passionate interest for mice

Juice - Oprah Winfrey imitations

Mineral water - Embarrassing rash

Hot chocolate - Eggplant-fetishism

Whisky - To ruin the second world war

Other - To hate the Boston Celtics

12. To which country would you prefer to go on a vacation?

Thailand - Warm regards

USA - Best regards

England - Good luck on your short-term leave from jail

Spain - Go and drown yourself

China - Disgusting regards

Germany - With ease

Japan - Go burn

Greece - Your everlasting enemy

Australia - Greetings to your frog Leonard

Egypt - Fuck off now

France - In pain

Other - Greetings to your freaky family

13. What is your favorite activities when hanging out with mates?

Gathering for drinks - Ugly pig

Foosball - Silly duck

Shopping - French kisser

Dulging for food - Cranky banana

Movies - Smelly armpits

Snacks - Horny wolf

Snooker - Tiny nipples

Bowling - Sexy grandmother

Outdoor activities - Vain pot

Having a long talk - Nose plucker

Taking pictures - Dumb bitch

Other - Burn yourself

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dear Denise,

I don't really know how to tell you this, but Our affair is over.I think I realized it when When we skinny dipped At the mental hospital and I saw you Carve your initials into Manchester United's goalkeeper. I'm sure you're Cowardly enough to understand That I did a sex-change. I'm returning Your ring to you, but I'll keep Your collection of butterflies as a memory. You should also know that I Always wanted to break. A new life as a clone.Greetings to your freaky family.

With Love;
Shazo

P/S: You are so lifeless, Nose plucker, Denise Chan Oi Oi.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I tag:

1. Rachel @ Wedgie
2. M
3. Jasreen
4. Bibo
5. Idan
6. Sarah
7. Jerusha
8. Adrina
9. Aliya Harun
10. Anne

Enjoy! =)

Brag#27: Homecoming by The Teenagers

Ok I hafta admit, they aren't that talented (somehow) but I find the beats like sexy
Anyway, I discovered this music video / song from Katy Perry's blog
The director for this MV is the same director who directed her I Kissed A Girl.
The director is Kinga Burza
Yes, weird name for a british lass, ain't it?
Anyway, I define this song as "Sarcastically Kinky" with a dash of "out of tune"

And Wedgie ...
SHUDDUP!
The song is ubberly sexindie!
Sing-a-long to the song already, you psycho fart monger !

The Teenagers 'Homecoming'

Lyrics:

Last week, I flew to San Diego to see my auntie.
On day 1, I met her hot step daughter;
She's a cheerleader, she is a virgin and she is really tan.
As she stepped out of her massive car, I could only notice she was more than fuckable.
I think she was coming back from the game or something 'cause she was holding those silly pompoms.
On day 2, I fucked her and it was wild. She is such a slut.

I fucked my American cunt.

I loved my English romance.

I fucked my American cunt.

I loved my English romance.

It was dirty, a dream came true.

Just like I like it she's got nice tits.

It was perfect, a dream came true.
Just like a song by blink182.

OK, listen girls! I met the hottest guy ever!
Basically, as I was stepping out of my SUV I came face to face with my step cousin or whatever... Who cares!
Anyway, he was wearing skinny jeans, had funky hair, and the cutest British accent ever!
Straight away I could tell he was a rocker with his sexy attitude and the way he looked at me...
Mmm, he is totally awesome!
Oh My God! I think im in love...

I fucked my American cunt.

I loved my English romance.

I fucked my American cunt.

I loved my English romance.

It was dirty, a dream came true.

Just like I like it she's got nice tits.

It was perfect, a dream came true.
Just like a song by blink182.

I fucked my American cunt.

I loved my English romance.

I fucked my American cunt.

I loved my English romance.

It was so nice to meet you.

Pleasure is mine, I do like you!

Come to Cancun for spring break?

I'll think about it, it could be great.

(And don't forget to send me a friend request!

As if...)

Brag#26 : Blooooduh

It is so retarded
yet
so adorable

...
still
...
it's retarded
roflskaters!

"Daddeeeeee, bloooooduh, not funneeeeeee!"

Brag#25 : Map To My Crib

i hope this shit makes sense :-s

Brag#23 : Sarcasism has never been this sexy

• A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.
  
• All of your ancestors must number in the millions; it's hard to believe that many people are to blame for producing you.
  
• All that you are you owe to your parents.
  Why don't you send them a penny and square the account?
• Any friend of yours ... is a friend of yours.
  
• Any similarity between you and a human is purely coincidental!
  
• Anyone who told you to be yourself couldn't have given you worse advice.
  
• Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?
  
• As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
  
• At least you are not obnoxious like so many other people - you are obnoxious in a different and worse way!
  
• Brains aren't everything
  . In fact, in your case they're nothing!
  
• Calling you stupid would be an insult to stupid people.
  
• Can I borrow your face for a few days while my ass is on vacation?
  
• Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent!
  
• Don't get insulted, but is your job devoted to spreading ignorance?
  
• Don't let your mind wander -- it's too little to be let out alone.
  
• He's not stupid; he's possessed by a retarded ghost.
  
• I don't know what makes you so stupid, but it really works!
  
• I don't know who you are, but whatever it is, I'm sure everyone will agree with me.
  
• I don't mind that you are talking so long as you don't mind that I'm not listening.
  
• I like you. People say I've no taste, but I like you.
  
• I like your approach, now let's see your departure.
  
• I'd like to give you a going-away present ... but you have to do your part.
  
• I'd like to help you out. Which way did you come in?
  
• I'd like to leave you with one thought ... but I'm not sure you have a place to put it!
  
• I'd like to see things from your point of view but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
  
• I'll never forget the first time we met - although I'll keep trying.
  
• I'm busy now. Can I ignore you some other time?
  
• I'm glad to see you're not letting your education get in the way of your ignorance.
  
• There are several people in this world that I find obnoxious and you are all of them.

Brag#22: Graffited Wedgie

Brag#21: The Birds & The Bees , Patrick & Eugene

Annoying Singing mini Hagrids

awhgaaaaaaaaawd

why do I even bother o_O ?
I don't understand myself... Oh dear...

Brag#20: The Secret Life of Bees

I AM MAJOR EXCITED FOR THIS MOVIE!

QUEEN LATIFAH
(Queen of Talent!)
DAKOTA FANNING
(the kid that makes you wish you wna be her)
JENNIFER HUDSON
(from her winning supporting role for Dreamgirls, and yes I've seen her act - she was brilliant!)
ALICIA KEYS
(I believe this is most likely her FIRST act in a movie so I am pretty excited about that.
In fact during my watch on her video clip of Teenage Love Affair and You'll Never See Me Again, I had a strong sense she would turn out to be in the movies one day and BAM! here she is with the best actresses in Hollywood!)
SOPHIE OKONEDO

(I've so far only remember her as the 4-handed woman in red from AeonFlux she stared aside with Charlize Theron. But I'm pretty sure she has acted much more outstanding roles in other movies, just that I'm not pretty clear whats it were ... BUT SHE IS REAL GOOD ANYWAY, with out a doubt fosho)

The movie is based from this book by Sue Monk Kidd
(lol at first I spelled it Dikk instead - wtf is wrong with me lol)

Anyhow, The Secret Life Of Bees, is set in South Carolina in 1964, is the moving tale of Lily Owens (Fanning) a 14 year-old girl who is haunted by the memory of her late mother (Burton). To escape her lonely life and troubled relationship with her father (Bettany), Lily flees with Rosaleen (Hudson), her caregiver and only friend, to a South Carolina town that holds the secret to her mother's past. Taken in by the intelligent and independent Boatwright sisters (Latifah, Okonedo and Keys), Lily finds solace in their mesmerizing world of beekeeping.

So yeah!


Let's see... what can I predict about movie... Hm...
I'm sure they'll involve some singing... I THINK la coz ... there was a black dude sang a lil so its a sign plus you've got Quenn Latifah, Jennifer Hudson & Alicia Keys ! HOW COULD THEY NOT SING! They better sing or else this movie is just going to disappoint meh!
Ok maybe not so disappointing ah... but really, why put 3HREE talented singers in one movie - WHY if its not for that gifted voice box in their throat - tell meh lay-dees and gent-tell-men! lol But the again, its alright if the don't, it's just the thought of having very talented people in one movie is just total awesome sauce, just makes you wna hump to honey comb :D !

And of YES! DAKOTA FANNING is so grown up! She has REAL TITTIES! ITS REAL! Those lil humps are NATURAL REAL TITTIES! She's such a big girl now!
Aaaaaaaaaawe ... *wipes happy tears*
And ohmahgawdness, for an early teenager, she can pull of an accent like that and she did so majorly well like she just blew me with ommahgawded away!
See what I mean how effing gifted she is and makes you so jealous you just want to be her!? I've adore DF since ... hm... since all her movies, the year when Hide & Seek came out.
I sooooo really hope she doesn't end up like Lohan or that one hit wonder kid from ET, I really hope she becomes waaaay succesful than Drew Barrymore (I love Barrymore, she's so cuteness)

Anyhow, since the movie is based from a book, this movie SHOULD be really good like major major good... More than major good, somewhat to ultimate awesome sauce covered on awesomeness.
This movie better not let me down, the trailer has got hooked and I can't wait to check it out.
ALL MOVIES BASED FROM BOOKS ARE AWESOMENESS! ... except for Harry Potter because they've chopped down a WHOLE lot from the original story line - betches.


I CAN'T WAIT FOR THIS MOVIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!


oh, and also a Singaporian indie movie which Siti Danisa Mahmud (I named her that) has starred in The Funeral Party, which she said it's a dark comedy, I like dark comedy, Tim Burton for the win!
So DENISE CHAN, the girl I met in My Chemical Romance mosh pit back in 9Dec'07, I'm still stalking you *secretly evil LOL* ... and King-ky <3
lol and oh yes - before you, my dear readers, about to dial for the FBI saying you've found a stalker, better don't.
I'm just Denise's personal stalker, we're friends - we talk, we don't run after each other with a Chicken Rice Butcher Knive. LoL
I'm the friendly stalker
GGG (Gelak Golek Golek, meaning RollOverLaughing) stupid

ha... ANYWAY, I WANT TO WATCH THE SECRET LIFE OF BEES!
and Funeral Party =)




and curses this damn editing post shet, I've ALREADY SET THE FONTS SIZE CORRECTLY, WHY DO YOU NOT OBEY MY COMMAND!?!? DO YOU WANT ME TO KEEP TYPING IN THE WRATH OF THE CAPS LOCKS JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS????
geezuz

Brag#19 : Let the Pictures Does the Answering

a) Answer the questions below, do a Google Image search with your answer, take a picture from the first page of results, and do it with minimal words of explanation.

b) Tag 5 other people to do the same once you've finished answering every question.

1) the age you'll be on your next birthday

i never thought searching for 23 is so difficult under the first page of search lol wth

2) a place you'd like to travel to:

NYC !

3) your favourite place:

anywhere will do as long I could stargaze peacefully

4) your favourite food:

5) your favourite pet:

6) your favourite colour combination:

7) your favourite piece of clothing:

8) your favourite song:

(Thinking Of You, Katy Perry)

9) your favourite tv show:

10) first name of your significant other/crush:

Che'Nelle - Got A Storray For Ya *giggle*

11) the town in which you live:

(Shah Alam)

12: your screen name/nickname:

Shazalomaniac :p

13) your first job:

banquet waitress in Concorde Hotel

14) your dream job:

Music Video Director !

15) a bad habit you have:

16) your worst fear:

creepy crawlers generally, those with more than 8 legs or worm-like .. eek!

17) the thing you'd like to do before you die:


18) 5 people to tag:

• Wedgie
• M
• Denise
• Sarah
• Jasreen
  

Brag#18 : Kinda's Giberish Scary Looking Humpty Dumpty [looks like Micheal Jackson ya'll]

Kinda
yaybo shakey
me unscrabbly
SHOCKADOOBEE!
doublie shockadoobee!
popswable uhuhu
toooy
yodleyammanchocoscrubwizmultipoploversdiiiiiiie
oh grubbly
me scroobbe now
nokko
weeeeeeeeee!